I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
