Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize