idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
