Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
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