yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
