Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
Randomize