if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
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