drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
We need to rekindle our bromance
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
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