I need to stop coming to work sober
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
