He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
Farmville is her only friend.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
Randomize
