2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Randomize
