I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
This show inspires me to have sex in space
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
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