Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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