We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize
