Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
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