If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Randomize
