bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
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