She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
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