Nicole vs. Life
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
