Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
Randomize
