woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
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