Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
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