I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
