The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
The beer is more important than you right now.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
Randomize
