I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Randomize
