thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Randomize
