she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize