i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Randomize
