i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Randomize
