my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
Randomize
