nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Randomize
