Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Is Oprah even human
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
