If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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