Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
