I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Randomize