New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
Randomize