Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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