where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
Randomize
