I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
No I am not eating basil off your cock
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
