i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Randomize
