Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Randomize
