So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
I will be naked everywhere
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize