how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Randomize
