She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
Randomize
