did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Boobs speak an international language.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
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