Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Randomize
