She's JV to your varsity
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
Sorry about my life...
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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