that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
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