: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
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