why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
Randomize
