Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
Randomize
